2 PerspectivesDecember 4, 2009

Delivering Bad News in Negotiation: How Big Is Your Conference Room?

The conference table had 40 chairs, and my client’s team filled almost half of them.  We had been asked to show up with the folks needed to get a deal done, and the backchannel weekend chatter had all been positive.  As the meeting began, our optimism crashed as the other side went on the attack, denying my client’s most important request and questioning why it had ever been included.

People usually need to hear the truth whether it’s convenient or not, but there’s more than one one way to convey a difficult message.  How often have you seen someone delight in dropping bad news onto the conference table as the meeting begins?  The adrenaline rush might satisfy some, but does this approach do any good?

Thank You for Your Interest

The lawyer who delivered the bad news to my team that day prided himself in his aggressive persona, and his performance was true to his reputation.  Unfortunately his glee was short-lived; my team and I worked night and day to More…

Categories: Communication, Fundamentals, Mediation, Negotiation, Settlement, Tactics

1 PerspectiveJune 18, 2009

When Not To Negotiate: My Tree, My Neighbor’s House

How do you negotiate with your neighbor as your tree sits on his roof? The subject line only read “Tree Down,” but I began to wonder. The irony wasn’t lost on me as I scanned the rest of the message.  A storm, our tree, our neighbor’s house, and a scramble to respond — all as I sat in a seminar on advanced dispute resolution techniques two time zones away. I was soon reminded of a valuable lesson in negotiation that most people never get: Do you even negotiate at all?

What’s Your First Move?

I have cited all manner of negotiation textbooks on this site, from Getting to Yes to Start with No and beyond — but if your answer to the question “What’s your first move?” was anything other than “Get the tree off his house,” take a deep More…

Categories: Communication, Fundamentals, Negotiation

7 PerspectivesFebruary 13, 2009

Settlement Advice: Avoid the Assembly Line

The other day I wrote a post about trust. It was a simple post, really. I recounted a story about a recent tire purchase where I asked for four new tires, and my service rep convinced me I only needed three. I trust her more now than I did before, and to most this would hardly be a controversial result. It took a lawyer at Legal OnRamp to turn this ordinary lesson in trust into much more.

An Unexpected Lesson at Legal OnRamp

Soon after publishing my post I stumbled across a reply on Legal OnRamp, More…

Categories: Communication, Fundamentals, Settlement

4 PerspectivesJanuary 30, 2009

One Tire Too Many: An Unexpected Lesson in Trust

The story might be better if I could make it more dramatic, but tires aren’t all that exciting. My car had turned 5 and rolled past 45,000 miles, and there was little debate — I needed new ones. I braced myself for an expensive day, pulled into Sewell Lexus, and asked for four new tires. My unexpected lesson in trust came when my service rep suggested that wasn’t really what I needed.

One Tire Too Many

As you might imagine, I wasn’t in the mood to reconsider my need for tires, and my request hadn’t been ambiguous. But my longtime service advisor pushed, and I listened with patient annoyance. She explained that she’d be happy to sell More…

Categories: Communication, Education, Negotiation, Theory